Happy New Year blog people, well huzzah, it’s 2014. I write this post as I watch an absolutely cringe worthy segment on the Today show about keeping New Year’s resolutions (cliche much?). They’ve even gone all pro by using a psychologist, a psychologist who is spurting out first year psych motivation theories that are making me question her qualifications. They do this every year while people giggle about how they’re never going to keep their resolutions. Yes, because New Year’s resolutions are stupid.
I spent New Year’s Eve absolutely taking the piss out of people’s NYE statuses about how much they hated 2013 and how they’re going to be so so different in 2014. Why? What has magically changed overnight? Is it drugs? Do you guys have a super secret stash of personality-altering drugs that are highly illegal which is why they aren’t referenced in your Facebook status? If so, kudos. Then there’s the other camp who decide that 2013 was the best year of their life. OF THEIR LIFE PEOPLE. If you’re 60+ this statement could be valid. I refuse to believe until I’m freaking dead that any year was the best one….you haven’t lived an entire life. So it was just a really good year. Just say that. And guys, if you made a status like this, relax; it’s nothing personal I just make fun of everything on Facebook these days. Love you guys. I especially love you guys who just made a normal NYE status….or a cynical one (you guys are my favourite).
Now to two of my favourite resolutions that people make. The first is the “I will go to the gym” resolution. Peeps, if it has taken you until NY to get there, of course it’s going to be harder to keep it. That’s because deep down you are a perfectly normal person who hates the gym because those skinny girls in the expensive gym wear are just out to get you. Or maybe we’re all paranoid schizophrenics who hide it really well. Either way, if you want to go to the gym it’s quite simple: you will go, you’ve probably already started. If you hate the gym, make a resolution to walk outside or something. Second is the “I will stop drinking” resolution. All together? That seems a little extreme, unless you are genuinely an alcoholic and need to stop. But for the people that are spending NYD hungover and pledged the night before to quit alcohol in the new year, maybe you’re not ready to quit yet. Just a thought. Maybe aim to be able to remember your name, marital status and location by the end of each night spent out.
So really, NY Resolutions are stupid. If you really want to change yourself or something about your life you should do it because you want to, not because it’s New Year’s. It really doesn’t matter if you decide to change yourself in January, March or the middle of October; it’s about you, not about some obsolete societal idea that every year we must undergo some metamorphosis. If you like yourself just fine, then don’t feel the need to proclaim some need to change.
Rant over kids, have a fun year.
Peace, Love, Buffy.